People often think having power means having power OVER another person.
In other words, they use their power in the form of anger to over-power someone else; to get their own way.
But really power is simply energy.
In relationships it relates to how we assert ourselves, to get our own needs met and meet the needs of others.
And we get to choose whether we do that constructively or destructively.
If we do it constructively (with respect and with a win-win attitude) our experience in relationships will probably err on the side of satisfying and harmonious.
But if we do it destructively we will cause harm and end up feeling dissatisfied and alone.
Think of Martin Luther King and Gandhi.
Both men used their ‘power’ (influence, energy) to affect change – but without violence.
So What Is The Difference Between Anger and Abuse?
If used inappropriately anger can quickly convert to violence or abuse, but the actual feeling of anger is healthy.
It alerts us to injustice – whether perceived or actual. It lets us know that something is wrong.
It is when we take our anger and impose it on someone else against their will, that it crosses the line into violence, abuse or bullying.
What if it were possible to differentiate between the feeling of anger and the behaviour?
What if you could learn to tune into yourself and grow in your awareness of what is happening both inside and around you?
And then – what if you could communicate (use your power, influence, energy) in a constructive, non-abusive way?
So many questions.
Maybe, just maybe, the lens of “things have to go my way” (win-lose) – can be adjusted to a different lens.
One that respects the other person’s wants and needs as well as your own.
For those willing to take the journey the end result is learning to develop relationships that are more satisfying and harmonious.
It could be you.
If you would like help with your anger, please contact Deborah Sanasi on 0416 166 501 to make an initial consultation.
We are conveniently located around the Norwest, Baulkham Hills, Bella Vista, Castle Hill, Kellyville, Glenwood, Stanhope Gardens and Hills District areas.
Do you have questions or would you like to enquire about an appointment? Please leave your details below and I will be on contact with you soon.
We are situated in Lexington Drive, Bella Vista. Please feel free to contact Deborah Sanasi on 0416 166 501 to arrange an initial consultation.
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I am much more aware of my needs and how to ask for emotional support when I need it. My relationship with my husband is stronger and more supportive for me and for him.Heather, 42